Being older has its disadvantages—grey hair, achy muscles and joints, and the need to sleep more. One of the advantages of being older for me has been learning from experience, especially learning from things that I have done well and, more so, from things that have not gone so well.

One thing I have learned from experience is that questions are often much more important than answers. Some of you may think that we are all seeking answers, and that is true. I find that knowing what to ask leads to the best answers. Let me share more about this.

My first example will come from something we have all done or will do: buy a car. I remember the first car I bought on my own after we first got married. What a fiasco that was. This was in 1983, and interest rates for used vehicles hovered around 18% and I did no negotiation whatsoever in the process. The car was a good one, and we had several years of usage from this vehicle. In subsequent car purchasing experiences, I learned to ask more about who owned the car (if it was used), how much room there was for negotiating the price, and I also learned to ask questions about other vehicles that might also be a satisfactory replacement for what I was considering.

My experience with questions really grew when I moved into the HR field about 25 years ago. A big part of working in human resources involves learning more about people; who they are, what they like, and what they want to do. This involved not only the hiring process, but also the development process. Too often, I had previously come to my own conclusions rather than engage others in dialogue and use questions to probe deeper.

Fast forward to my time in the executive search world and now in the executive coaching and business consulting world. I have the opportunity to work with smart people who have great ideas, but who often need to consider options. My ability to ask the right question may mean the difference between a quick decision that has limited impact or a well-thought-out decision that has significant impact. In many cases, I have seen circumstances where not asking the right question has caused a process or episode to have a less-than-optimal outcome.

I intend to spend time over a series of posts sharing more about the value of questions, and to also go into some detail about the different types of questions you might use and when to use them.

Let me pose a question as I finish this segment:

-What is the most important question you have ever asked another person?
-Additionally, what is the most important question you have ever been asked?

I look forward to your responses. I’ll be back again next week with more questions and a few answers.